His Moans, Her Moans, Hormones

I remember fondly an old girl friend, Georgia. This "southern belle" was quite an aroused and vocal lover. Now this would not necessarily pose a problem; actually it was pretty exciting. However, Georgia was Christian and I'm Jewish. Initially, when Georgia was calling out rapturously, "Oh God. Oh God"...I was still with her. But when she started crying out "Oh Jesus"... I started feeling a little strange. Perhaps I was fortunate. Imagine how I would have felt if Georgia was Catholic and calling out "Oh Jesus, Mary and Joseph." (Actually, that would have been more familiar. I've known a few Jewish women that psychologically bring their whole family to bed with them.)

 Anyway, I'm trying to be broad-minded, but with wave after wave of "Oh Jesus...Ohhh Jesus," I'm becoming more uncomfortable. And, of course, I'm also getting perturbed because, hey, I'm doing all the work and he's getting all the credit.

 So after about the sixteenth "Ohh Jesus," I decide to get Georgia's attention by slowing down the action. When she finally opens her eyes, I say, "Georgia, let's be fair. How about an 'Oh Moses' every once in awhile!"

 Give the gift of tolerance this Valentine's Day and, of course, Practice Safe Stress!