Quiet Flows the CourageA colleague and good friend responded to the story of the woman harassed by her corproate employer. Just so no one thinks I'm just picking on the private sector, let's have a hellacious story from the public school system. Sam - aka Bogie 361@aol.com - take it away. Thanks for the "Cutting Edge....." (Ed. note: This Is a wicked satire that I've written on how top management can screw up a downsizing. Email stressdoc@aol.com if you'd like a copy) I'll use some of it tomorrow on my client. Tasha's story is very familiar to me, since I was a Chapter Leader for 10 years in the school system and filed many teacher grievances. Tasha and her husband should know that they are not alone. The most pointed to grievance in the work place throughout the U.S. is the relationship between the employee and the employer. I had to handle such emotional grievances, that at times I had the Principals, The Superintendant, The School Board, The teachers, and even their husbands (one threatened to kill me) on my back. I even had to see a therapist. Finally, I learned one thing; that everything I did for the Union and the teachers and in my classroom was business. I refused to take any of it home with me. I stopped my shouting and spoke to everyone in a soft, calm voice even when they shouted. My defining moment was when, during an afternoon school meeting the assistant principal started to criticize a number of the teachers, by name, one by one. I stood up and in a soft voice asked the A.P. to cease this procedure. She shouted that I should "get out". I refused (still speaking softly) and warned her that I would file a grievance against her. She did cease but said she would charge me with insubordination. Nothing came of the whole thing except that my leadership was established. My friend Sanford Blair, who was district UFT leader, continued to shout and overreact. Last year after dining with his family and mine at the Baychester Diner we talked in the Parking lot, and I said to him, "Isn't this what it's all about. Eating out with your family and having warm. intimate conversation. Isn't it better than all this shouting and waving placards." He smiled. Sadly, last December, my friend Sandy died from heart failure. Sam, as you know, it takes maturity and self-awareness to resist succumbing to the rage and hostility of others in a position of power, either by being intimidated or by becoming enraged. Yet, sadly, there may be a price when we don't. Quiet yet firm assertion is a powerful position that both allows for standing up to a bully or, if in an untenable situation, walking away with your integrity affirmed. Remember...Practice Safe Stress! Special Announcements: a) email if you'd like to subscribe to my new, free newsletter, b) Leading a "Shrink Rap and Group Chat" for Digital City-Washington, the 2nd and 4th Mondays of every month, 9-10pm EDT. Field questions on stress, relationship issues, school/job problems, career transition, etc. Definitely a lively hour. Here's the link: <A HREF="aol://4344:363.gorkin.5732839.568857121">Chat with the Stress Doc</A> c) Starting a Multi-Media Coaching for Consultants Program, especially (though not exclusively) for allied/mental health professionals, organizational trainers and consultants, counselors and educators. For information on the products and instructional services, including one-on-one online consultation, bulletin board access and particpation in a chat/support group, email me at Stress Doc@aol.com. Feedback Segment: How about sharing your thoughts on how you, friends or colleagues use humor in dealing with stress, conflict or moods, yours or others, in your personal life, at home or at work? HFTE will run the best stories and, of course, credit you. |