The Sublime Absurdity of Women's Shoes
Walking by a woman's shoe store with a friend reminded me again of the benefits of being attracted by the absurd. Now I'm not implying that (all) women's shoe styles are ridiculous or that I have a shoe or foot fetish. Let me retrace my steps, back to those lazy, crazy days in New Orleans...
I had just been a guest on Yvonne La Fleur's Cable TV Show. The program was basically an early, pre-home shopping infomercial enticing the boutique's audience -- "The Sensual Southern Belle." Now I was bit surprised when Yvonne had invited me on the show to talk about stressors confronting the modern day working woman. But I was shocked when she, soon after, asked me to return and discuss the psychology of women's shoes!
Now what does one do with such an offer? If one has any sense of propriety or proportion, one tactfully declines. In my case, when you are a moth to the light of a studio camera...(I had just finished my own run with a Cable health feature.) Well, I gulped quietly and said, "Sure thing." I hung up the phone and then panicked: "What the hell did I know about women's shoes?" (Warning: Trite and obvious puns lie ahead. Read and groan at your own risk!) So I immediately gathered some well-heeled female friends for a solefu l discussion. (Now that wasn't too painful?)
Actually, I discovered that every woman has a shoe story. Not surprisingly, as the culture mythologizes women's shoes - from Cinderella's glass slipper and Dorothy's ruby reds to those balletic red shoes or, even, Nancy Sinatra's attitude walking books. Romance and power, magic and down to earth. Also, women's shoes seem to be a symbolic, as well as a physical, marker of maturation - from the first strapless shoe and the pump to her first pair of three inch heels. Of course, many would say high heels represent bondage. Are we talking "S" and "M" and the transfer of sex-role power or about enslavement to the fashion industry, male fantasy and foot doctors: "Bondage or Bunions?" Next on Geraldo.
Still, motives can be complex. One of my "well-heeled" friends, Dorothy, a tall, lean, attractive woman recalled a certain Dallas avenue from her youth. This avenue was known as the venue for the world's most beautiful women. And when Dorothy turned eighteen, she put on those three inch stilettos and strutted her stuff. (And please, this was not a thoroughfare to have been frequented by the likes of Hugh Grant or Eddie Murphy.) Now Dorothy had more sense than to live in high heels. She eventually discarded them for many years. But then, she sheepishly admitted, one of the first items she bought after her divorce...a pair of 3" heels!
Anyway, as I'm ruminating upon the above, feeling some self-imposed pressure to do justice on camera to the symbolic, sublime and silly...an inspiring idea jumps out. I'll write some verse. And I did:
Those New Pair of Shoes
Well you got the blues Still you just can't lose Cause your ready to cruise In those new pair of shoes.
Well you've paid your dues So your feet can choose To amuse or make news In those new pair of shoes.
Don't let them confuse Your personal views There's only one muse... Yvonne LaFleur Shoes!
So I get on the show. Make a few semi-serious comments, then announce that this unique project inspired me. I pair a jazzy-blues rhythm with the lyrics...and "just do it!" Well, the camera crew went nuts. They loved it. Yvonne, at first, was sort of stunned; she then broke into a broad grin.
Of course, I had set myself up. Whenever I went back on the show, they expected a wild number. Hey, not all topics can induce the creative state of sublime absurdity. But when you sense that timing, mindset and edginess are alligned...go for it. Just as you would for a great sale on a dynamite, hip pair of shoes!
And, of course, especially when on the edge...Practice Safe Stress!
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Mark Gorkin, "The Stress Doc," Licensed Clinical Social Worker, is a nationally recognized speaker, workshop leader and author on stress, reorganizational change, anger, team building, creativity and humor. The Stress Doc is a columnist for the popular cyber-newsletter, Humor From The Edge. Mark is also the "Online Psychohumorist" for the major AOL mental health resource network, Online Psych . His motto: Have Stress? Will Travel! Reach "The Doc" at (202) 232-8662, email: Stress Doc@aol.com