Thirsting and Thrusting for Peak Performance

Here is another column to encourage creativity and peak performance. Having struggled with performance pressure for many years, I feel compelled to relive and write about my past traumas. In particular, two performance arenas for anxiety stand out, arenas in which I am highly motivated: performing for radio and TV and performing for sex...Ooops. I mean sexual performance. (Though in my more depressed and dysfunctional days, I'm sure I did perform for, and try to please through, sexual activity.)

Actually, there are five fundamental, if not existential, questions that underline the performance angst in both the public performance and private peformance realms:

First, can you do it? Second, how good can you do it? Next, if you can't do it good, how well can you fake it? Fourth, how long can you last? And, fifth, and most important, will they want you to come back and do it again?

Frustration or Thrustration

And speaking of the connection between performance art and sexual performance, let me illuminate a most frustrating yet vital concept in the field of peak performance -- "thrustration." By definition, if you're aiming for originality or peak performance, at some point in the preparation or problem-solving process, you will hit a wall. Too many peple, when facing what seems to be an insurmountable obstacle, prematurely give up. This is when we have to sleep on the problem. Or, you may run with an idea only to find that it leads to an apparent dead end. For example, I pursue a novel idea till the idea is exhausted...or I am. If it's me, I take a break. If it's the idea, after groaning and gowling...I let go: "Mark, stop being so enamoured with your precious concept." I must momentarily detach from, if not literally tear up, sometimes throw up, this mental flotsam in my gut or belief system. I have to risk feeling bereft and aimless.

Fortunately, psychic death often begets unexpected and fertile life. As French author and philosopher, Albert Camus, noted: "Once we have accepted the fact of loss we understand that the loved one [or loved idea] obstructed a whole corner of the possible pure now as a sky washed by rain." Of course, true acceptance doesn't come easy or without some pain. As I once poetically penned:

"Whether the loss is a key person, a desired position or a powerful illusion, each deserves the respect of a mourning. The pit in the stomach, the clenched fists and quivering jaw...the anguished sobs prove catalytic in time. In mystical fashion, like Spring upon Winter, the seeds of dissolution bear fruitful renewal."

So creative confusion and frustration tolerance is needed for disrupting habitual, traditional or convenient patterns of thought. And for impeding the quick fix. Innovation often involves discovering, defining or (re)designing the right problem, however challenging or however time-consuming. Sometimes it's more important to be problem-minded than solution-focused. Author and psychiatrist, Richard Rabkin, calls this necessary impasse "thrustration." I've defined this concept thusly: "when you're torn between thrusting ahead with direct action and frustration...as you cannot quite put together the pieces of the puzzle."

This mounting pressure not only compels us to let go, but helps the brain become an active psychic volcano, in particular, stimulating the right hemisphere. Symbolic and visual imagery, subconscious and seemingly contradictory associations and deep-seated memories flow to the surface. This occurs in night and daydreaming or in those twilight states, as one drifts out of consciousness and just before fully awakening from a sleep.

So have some bittersweet dreams and twilight reveries...And next time, I'll share a personal example of creative thrustration and "finding the pass in the impasse." Until then, of course...Practice Safe Stress!

Feedback Segment: How about sharing your thoughts on how you, friends or colleagues use humor in dealing with stress, conflict or moods, yours or others, in your personal life, at home or at work? HFTE will run the best stories and, of course, credit you. (And the real lagniappe, you become a member of the Stress Doc's StressBusters Club.) Also, email me to learn more about "The Stress Doc's" upcoming serious and humorous on-line support/chat group -- "The Frequent Sighers Club."