WHAT I HAVE LEARNED
by Francisco J. Garcia Seijas

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.  

I've learned that it's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts. 

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes. After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do, but to the best you can do. 

I've learned that it's not what happens to people that's important. It's what they do about it. 

I've learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you a heartache for life. 

I've learned that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.   I've learned that it's a lot easier to react than it is to think. 

I've learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't.  I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. 

I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you.  I've learned that learning to forgive takes practice. 

I've learned that there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it. 

I've learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score.  I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. 

I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

And I've learned...that we can learn how to...Practice Safe Stress!

A Dead Horse

This I believe is from wlbowman@mail.biosis.org. Rumor has it he knows a company that's going down the toobs and created this lasting testament to the corporate chiefs...

A Dakota tribal wisdom says that when you discover you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount.

In business, however, it seems that we often try other strategies with dead horses, including the following:

1. Buying a stronger whip.

2. Changing riders.

3. Saying things like, "This is the way we have always ridden this horse."

4. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

5. Arranging to visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses.

6. Increasing the standards to ride dead horses.

7. Appointing a tiger team to revive the dead horse.

8. Creating a training session to increase our riding ability.

9. Comparing the state of dead horses in today's environment.

10. Change the requirements declaring that, "This horse is not dead."

11. Hire contractors to ride the dead horse.

12. Harnessing several dead horses together for increased speed.

13. Declaring that, "No horse is too dead to beat."

14. Providing additional funding to increase the horse's performance.

15. Do a CA Study to see if contractors can ride it cheaper.

16. Purchase a product to make dead horses run faster, like a new saddle.

17. Declare the horse is, "better, faster and cheaper" dead.

18. Find a quality circle to find users for dead horses.

19. Revisit the performance requirements for horses.

20. Say this horse was procured with cost as an independent variable.

21. Promote the dead horse to a management position.

I should mention this list was handed to me by a member of a displaced federal employees work retraining group. When you've been downsized, it can help the old ego to bring more powerful others, however briefly, down to size. Reminds, me of my wicked, satirical advice to top management on how to handle a downsizing: "The Stress Doc's Top Ten Tips for Tip Top Managment." For a copy, just email stressdoc@aol.com.

And, of course...Practice Safe Stress!

Special Announcements:

a) email stressdoc@aol.com if you'd like to subscribe to my new, free newsletter -- Notes From an Online Psychohumorist (TM) b) Leading a "Shrink Rap and Group Chat" for Digital City-Washington, the 2nd and 4th Mondays of every month, 9-10pm EDT. Field questions on stress, relationship issues, school/job problems, career transition, etc. Definitely a lively hour. Here's the link: Chat with the Stress Doc</A c) Starting a Multi-Media Coaching for Consultants Program, especially (though not exclusively) for allied/mental health professionals, organizational trainers and consultants, counselors and educators. For info on the products and instructional services, including: ** one-on-one online consultation and group chat ** copywriting and humor writing; website design ** bulletin board access... email me at Stress Doc@aol.com

Feedback Segment: How about sharing your thoughts on how you, friends or colleagues use humor in dealing with stress, conflict or moods, yours or others, in your personal life, at home or at work? HFTE will run the best stories and, of course, credit you.